Let’s talk about self-control today. 

For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. (2 Timothy 1:7 ESV)

Self-Control is used for so many things. Food, habits, fighting against sin, and a plethora of other things, and we, as christians, are promised a helper when it comes to self-control.

I chose ESV for this because it says self-control explicitly, but CSB says “sound judgment” instead, and I love both! We live in a world where self-control is treated like a frivolous virtue. Why be in control or disciplined when you can indulge in just about anything you want. Between the internet, media, and even our own relationships, everything we could ever want is right at our fingertips, all we have to do is do. 

If I crave some chicken minis from Chick-Fil-A, I can just have it delivered if I can’t leave my desk. If I want a break from my job, I can surf social media for a while. If I want to gossip under the guise of venting (come on, we all do it, don’t act like I’m alone in this), I just send a voice memo. 

Everything is so easy to access, there’s no reason not to indulge, except that we are called not to. WE ARE CALLED NOT TO. When we accept Christ, we accept the Holy Spirit coming into us to help us achieve our calling: to glorify God.

Now, when we planned this post, my intention was to talk about gossip. We know (because it’s stated several times in the Bible. Titus 2:3, 1 Timothy 3:11, James 4:11, Leviticus 19:16 are just a few examples) that gossip is bad, we know that slandering others isn’t what we’re called to, but we constantly find ourselves talking badly about people with our friends and family, right?

And while I will touch on it a bit, I’m feeling a little angry with myself at the moment, so we’re going to take a few steps back and talk about self-control as a whole.

I have a sin that I struggle with. While I won’t share exactly what it is for all the internet to see, it’s a sin that I am deeply ashamed of. One that I find myself turning back to constantly. 

Tell me, reader, what’s yours? That vice that you apologize for CONSTANTLY because it’s so ingrained in your person that it seems impossible to kick?

Is it pride with a need for everyone to know that you are the best and smartest person in the room? Is it gossip with a need to share everything going on for the sake of having something to talk about? Is it sexual in nature? Is it completely internal? Is it something others see? Take a minute and think about it, because we all have one.

My heart aches when I realize I have done this sin. I feel like every other day I’m apologizing for the same thing!

Something that’s a real pet peeve of mine is open cabinets. When someone grabs a cup or some seasonings, and just leaves it open! It drives me insane to look into our kitchen or bathroom and see the cabinets wide open. I’ve mentioned this to my husband, and we have a process that works for us now! But, imagine if I told him that. I told him that it drives me insane, and it’s something that would take .2 seconds for him to fix, and he said “got it babe.” But then he did it every other day? Every other day he’d say “sorry babe, I forgot. I’m really sorry.” And even if it was genuine, if it keeps happening, that isn’t showing love. He isn’t loving me with his actions. (For clarity's sake, my husband is not this way in the slightest and is my favorite person ever by the way).

I feel like by having to apologize to God constantly for the same thing over and over again shows Him that I’m not loving Him well. Actions speak louder than words, right?

Why do we need self control

Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. (1 Corinthians 9:25 ESV)

Our Spiritual health depends on being disciplined. The same way a runner cannot run a marathon without practice, we cannot live like Christ without practicing. 

Responding in love isn’t something that comes naturally to me. I was raised in a household that it was normal to ignore people for periods of time, or respond in anger for the sake of “feeling better.” Hurting others to make ourselves feel better about a situation or emotions is the opposite of love.

So, how do you fix that?

By submerging ourselves into God’s Word, we see how we’re supposed to respond to things. With love, with faith, aiming to serve the people around us. 

Those habits we have: gossipping, acting out in anger/frustration, self indulgence, those things aren’t aligning with the way God wants us to live. If we aren’t living the way God wants us to, then what are we even doing?

Exercising self-control isn’t just us making the right decisions, but glorifying God through these decisions. We want to be the light and salt and all that jazz. 

As Paul mentions in his letter to the people of Corinth, our goal is much more important than anything here on earth. The things here of this earth are perishable. They will always fade away, but our salvation will not.

So, while things may be tempting here on earth: to vent about our brothers and sisters, to spend money haphazardly, to turn back to the same sin day in and day out, these things aren’t helping us reach our goal.

In conclusion, thank you all for sticking with me and my pregnancy brain! I want to encourage you all to look inside and find that thing that needs more self-control and pray for it! The Holy Spirit is our helper, and wants to help us succeed, allowing us the fruit of self control. Ask, and you shall receive.